Pools of sorrow, waves of joy are drifting through my open mind

June 16, 2008
(Spacing out)
From the Journal of Derek Rury

There was an instance this morning when we were eating breakfast and I turned around and looked behind me at the pibasy tree in the front yard, trying to temporarily escape the potential awkwardness that followed all of us finishing our meal, leaving us with nothing to do but sit and stare at our plates. But in that instance, I went from being in that moment, to having a completely random, foreign thought invade my thought process. It may have been about baseball, or even pecan pie, but it was transplanted into my cognitive process so fast, that I could not be sure. In that instance, I did not know who Rivo, Rina and Fetrasou were. I did not know where Alarobia was or what it even looked like. I did not know what “mitovi” or “kabone” meant. But as soon as that interrupting thought came, it vanished. And when I turned around, my mind almost went into shock trying to process all of the information I have gained since I left home at once. For a few seconds, I had to calm myself down and pray that they wouldn’t ask me anything that would require more than a head tilt and a grunt. If they did, I probably would have just sat there with the feeling you have as a child (or adult, apparently, if you’re me) when you are called on by the teacher for the answer and you have absolutely no clue what they are talking about. Except I live with these people. I have supplanted the head of the household from her master bedroom and placed all of my well being in their already burdened hands. Now I was going to seem like an ungrateful foreigner who didn’t even bother to learn their language to the extent to where I can respond to a simple, childish question. I was praying she wouldn’t ask me anything. But after another half minute of silence, she spread out her arm, smiled and motioned me to the door. She knew.

Across the Universe - The Beatles